My Healthiest Unhealthy Year

I think there is a notion that fit people may sustain themselves on carrots and lemon juice. While that may be for some, I can assure you for many it isn’t. In fact, it has been on the CDT that I have met the worst chain smokers. People that hike 50-60 km a day, smoking every 15 minutes. One guy, probably only a few years older than us, had a discolored mustache from smoke. When he ran out of cigarettes,  he tore up his map and smoked that with whatever tobacco remained. Thru hikers zoom by, chewing tobacco and smoking at the same time.  Carrots and lemon juice eh? We would probably try to stuff it into a cigarette.

The other day I realized I hadn’t had any fruits/veg for weeks. In fact, the only greenery I’m getting at the moment is whatever comes on a burger. You see, when the going gets tough, the tough don’t eat salad. Instead, you drench everything in ranch dressing. Eat the butter packets on the table while you wait for your deep fried meal. Chug the condiments and sip the coffee cream. Fill the Nalgene bottles with Mountain Dew. Maybe even add sugar packets.

We are in the best shape we have ever been. We can do 60 km in a day, with a full backpack, up and over mountains and passes. No worries. Then repeat. However, we are surviving on cookie-dough pop tarts, chips, and candy. As already mentioned, the only greenery we are eating is green number four food dye.  I don’t even remember what strawberries taste like. Sadly, I don’t even care. If it’s not deep fried and smothered in butter and ranch – I’m not interested.

DSC02578The burger at the Crossing in Wisdom, Montana. One of the best restaurants on the trail thus far! I could have moved in.

DSC02536God Bless America. All this food for under 20 dollars. See any vegetables? I sure don’t.

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